it’s not working

I know I’m supposed to be writing. I promise, I think about it every day. But I kill the words before they even come out. I’m so critical of myself, and I don’t know how to turn it off. Even now I’m tempted to hit the delete key and give up. I’m just…scrambling my fucking brain, trying to come up with a story, a memoir, a poem, an anything. Just like my paintings haven’t been turning out, neither is this… I don’t know if it’s that all my energy and effort is at school, and there’s nothing left for creativity? Maybe? I just hope it comes back, in some fashion. I haven’t been in any shows either, so it’s really like I have no creative outlet right now and I’m going mad.

Alright, that’s enough from me.

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