speaking of owls…

I did some more things while cooped up/should be resting but is arting everywhere instead. I made music note shaped wax melts! With (too much) bamboo fragrance, my own dried basil, and soy wax! I call them “Bamboosiled.” Eeee!!!

Oh and this painting came out of a low cycle…


And this thumbnail doodle comes from a happy place.



and now I’ma take pics and blog about it

So I’ve been working on this for a while. There are a lot of components here… The weird little gremlins who live in the cage — they are Anxiety and Depression. I made a girly, flowery bed to put them in when I’m done with them, but as with all things when it comes to me, it can’t be contained. I wish it looked as cool in pictures as it does in person, but maybe that’s part of the beauty of it.

The fight for you is all I’ve ever known

I have a hard time letting go.

There was the Barbie that was my very favorite with big purple eyes. Because she was my favorite she was also my little sister’s (the highest form of flattery, they attempted to convince me) and my mom gave the doll to her — probably because I was getting “too old” to play with dolls… I haven’t forgotten about it, or my absolute RAGE.

I put nails in the driveway to try and flat tire my cousin out of going back home to Illinois. I had a really short sighted idea of how that would play out — that she would magically be made to stay forever because of a nail in a tire. Speaking of which, I forced myself to throw up and make a big scene at McCarren Airport in effort to keep my internet boyfriend with me just a little bit longer. And it worked. Back then they let you do things like hop on a later flight and sit with your loved ones at the terminal.

Sometimes lyrics inspire me. I liked this one…I put it at the top. I hope it inspires you. It prompted one more memory in me, but that one will forever be a secret. I promise it’s just as twisted, dark and weird.

It occurs to me that my bipolar diagnosis makes a lot of sense. Insert emoji happy/crying face.

Build it in the Rain

Someone told me that if you pick one wall of a maze and follow it wherever it leads, you will eventually come to the exit. You could end up walking the entire thing, dead ends and all, but you’ll get there.

I guess I could Google it and find out if it’s true. But I’ve come this far, what would be the point in discouraging myself? I’m sure of so few things in my life… Let me have this one. Because if you mean to tell me that I’m lost…

watermelon muck

You know how you can get so miserable that you actually make yourself throw up to feel better? I’ve been trying to do that but with art…and apparently the science isn’t the same. When you stick your fingers down creativity’s throat, it’s not inspiration that comes up…just muck. And you don’t feel better about it.

Am I looking in a void or have I gone blind? Am I real or am I cycling?

I love watermelon. I had it for breakfast yesterday…but it made me sick. That’s never happened before. I’m sad about it for some reason…